Pregnancy, Estrogen, and WomenPREGNANCY Q & A & More!
Q: Should I have a baby after 35?
A: No, 35 children is enough.
Q: I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
A: With any luck, right after he finishes college.
Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex?
A: Childbirth.
Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's borderline irrational.
A: So what's your question?
Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right?!
A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.
Q: When is the best time to get an epidermal?
A: Right after you find out you're pregnant.
Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?
A: Not unless the word "alimony" means anything to you.
Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?
A: Yes, pregnancy.
Q: Do I have to have a baby shower?
A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly.
Q: Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?
A: When the kids are in college.
"ESTROGEN ISSUES"10 WAYS TO KNOW IF YOU HAVE "ESTROGEN ISSUES"
1. Everyone around you has an attitude problem.
2. You're adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelet
3. The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans.
4. Your husband is suddenly agreeing to everything you say.
5. You're using your cellular phone to dial up every bumper sticker that says: "How's my driving-call 1- 800-"
6. Everyone's head looks like an invitation to batting practice.
7. Everyone seems to have just landed here from "outer space."
8. You can'! t believe they don't make a tampon bigger than Super Plus.
9. You're sure that everyone is scheming to drive you crazy.
10. The ibuprofen bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday.
July 21, 2005
July 15, 2005
HANG ON GIRL!!! (sent to me via e-mail)
Hang on girl!!!
Eleven people were hanging onto a rope under a helicopter - 10 men and one woman.
The rope was not strong enough to carry them all, so they decided that one had to drop off, otherwise they all were all going to fall.
They were not able to choose that person, but then the woman made a very touching speech.
She said that she would voluntarily let go of the rope, because as a woman she was used to giving up everything for her husband and kids and for men in general without ever getting anything in return.
As soon as she finished her speech, all the men applauded.
SEND THIS STORY TO AN INTELLIGENT WOMAN SO THAT SHE HAS SOMETHING TO SMILE ABOUT TODAY! AND TO MEN YOU THINK HAS A GOOD SENSE OF HUMOR.
Eleven people were hanging onto a rope under a helicopter - 10 men and one woman.
The rope was not strong enough to carry them all, so they decided that one had to drop off, otherwise they all were all going to fall.
They were not able to choose that person, but then the woman made a very touching speech.
She said that she would voluntarily let go of the rope, because as a woman she was used to giving up everything for her husband and kids and for men in general without ever getting anything in return.
As soon as she finished her speech, all the men applauded.
SEND THIS STORY TO AN INTELLIGENT WOMAN SO THAT SHE HAS SOMETHING TO SMILE ABOUT TODAY! AND TO MEN YOU THINK HAS A GOOD SENSE OF HUMOR.
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