Touched by the hand of GOD

Hi,

You don't know me but I wanted to comment on your post about how your friend envisioned heaven. I think it's probably pretty accurate.

I wanted to share an experience I had when I was sixteen & was doubting my faith in God.

I was spending the night at a co-worker's house. Her parents always made her go to youth group on Saturdays. As I was a guest in her home, I went as well. I had been uprooted by my family a couple of months prior to this & had many bad experiences. Being from a small town in the Mid-west I was naive to say the least.

I mentioned that my faith was waning. It was waning because in two short months the following things had happened to me.

I narrowly missed being abducted on THREE separate occasions by THREE different individuals/groups of people.

I had to fight my way out of being date raped.

I had been informed that I would not be graduating with my class because so many of my required classes from Illinois did not transfer to Arizona. The only way to grad with my class was to go to night school & summer school. The money to do this was nowhere to be found...even from any relatives back in the Midwest.

I was working 35+ hours per week to help pay for rent & put food on our table.

My mother was rapidly spiraling into a deep depression was threatening to end it all daily. I had no idea WHAT to do about it. (Thankfully, she never did try to end it all)

My sister was also going into a depressed state, my brother was turning to drugs & my dad was working double shifts trying to pay the bills. Keep in mind we had left Illinois with what would fit in our van & an Cordoba...from a 15 room Victorian home.

Back to the youth group meeting.

Everyone was instructed to write on a piece of paper what they wanted to discuss & because the room the youth group usually met in was being painted, they met in the sanctuary instead. I had never been to a church in AZ so I was complete stranger to all except for my co-worker.

I was paired up with a teen aged boy, bless his heart. He let me talk & talk & cry & cry about everything that had been weighing on me so heavily. When time was up, he just held me in his arms & let me sob in silence.

Shortly thereafter, everyone knelt in prayer at the front of the sanctuary. There was this large cross with Christ nailed to it, illuminated by the sun streaming through a skylight. I was always told to keep my eyes closed with my head bowed in prayer, but something told me to look up.

When I did, I saw the hand of God come down & touch my heart. I cried silent tears like I've never cried before or since. Every teen there at youth group that day knew what I had seen.

I had a deep sense of peace & telling people about it still moves me to tears. If that is any indication of heaven is like, that is where I'd like to think I'll go when my time comes.

When I read your description of heaven, it brought me back to my experience that day 20 1/2 years ago. When I share the experience with people, many scoff or say I'm making it up.

Those who either know me or believe in God can see & hear it to be true. I don't know why I was chosen to have that experience.

I share it with people for many different reasons. It's not often that I share it, but I thought you could appreciate the experience & that maybe it would bring you some comfort while you are grieving the loss of your very dear friend Laurie.

My thoughts & prayers are with you.

Sincerely, Mary

The above is a copy of an e-mail I sent to a blogger tonight. I had been thinking about how blessed I am in light of all of the victims of Katrina. I am blessed & grateful for the following things &/or people in my life.

1. My loving devoted husband & 2 beautiful children.
2. My family, all of it's members no matter how much trouble they cause me at times. At least I HAVE family members to bug the heck out of me. They also have been a great support system when I've needed them most.
3. My pets. It may seem silly to some but they have often calmed me down enough to deal with things & made me feel loved when I felt unworthy of it.
4. My experiences & decisions both good & bad for they have made me the person I am today.
5. A strong sense of self & that my DH helped me find my way back to myself. Now I am working on what I don't like about myself, not just physically either. I believe the journey will help be become a better wife, mother, friend & human being.
6. My best friend that is like another sister to me. She has held my hand through break-ups, divorce, abuse, abortion & has never made me feel judged or "less than". She was there when I got married, with new jobs, new homes & new loves. I know not if my heart would have healed without her in my life. To me she is an earthbound angel....even if she thinks otherwise. She is the first person I call with news either good or bad. I truly love her like I love my sister. I been honored to call her my friend since 1993 when I met her at work.

There are more but I don't want to make this entry so long that nobody wants to read it.

My problems seem so small in comparison to what others are dealing with tonight.

• Katrina's victims
• My neighbor going off to Iraq soon, leaving his wife & two young children behind
• a fellow PG member that has likely lost everything
• my Uncle that found out this past Friday that he has Pancreatic Cancer
• all of the homeless, the poor, the ill & the grieving in the world
• those that feel trapped in bad relationships or dead-end jobs, feeling "forced" to hide their lifestyle choices or even feeling trapped by indecision about something in their life

Like I said, my problems are small in comparison. Things like ...

• Ow , I still have pain in my side from my c-section 3 months ago
• Sheesh, I'm paying $2.75 a gallon for gas at the pump
• how am I going to get everything done that I need to before we move into our new & larger home

Yes the pain in my side concerns me, but soon enough we will be insured once again & then I can have it looked at.

Yes we are paying $2.75 a gallon for gas, but we just won't make unnecessary trips to the store & such. It's something that we needed to change anyway.

I will find a way to get everything dome before moving day. At least I have a home to move to & I have stuff to put inside of it. It is something that sadly has been taken from thousands of people in the United States in the past 48 hours.

Like I said, my problems are small. I'm just glad that I can put it all into proper perspective.